Rock Bottom!

If you are not sitting down yet, you may want to have a seat. We here at JC are saddened that we have to bring you the news that The Jamster has checked into an exclusive (all-inclusive) substance abuse clinic in an undisclosed location. He was last seen at the Britney Spears After-after Party-party, where after a full day and night of drinking, The Jamster really cut loose and cleared out the bar while forcing the bartenders to keep pouring drinks down his throat. Paris Hilton was quoted after pulling his head out of the toilet, "It was so 'not' hot."

I don't know what else to write about this. I am going to go and sit in the corner and think about the impact this is going to have on the fragile psyches of millions of innocent little wanna-be Jamsters out there, all over the universe. JC out.

Out of control

Reports are starting to trickle in about the Jamster's latest episode of celebrity crash and burn. Once our sources have been verified, we will post shocking photographs of the Jamster at a Britney Spears After-after Party. Until then, here is a photo of the Jamster hanging with some old friends. The Jamster spent the day in his human form with close friends having a some beers and good times...... What ever happened to the Jamster every one from Kansas City to Kazakhstan loved?

The Interview of the Year

I've been receiving a lot of email begging for the release of the interview we did with the Jamster backstage at the Spring BBQ. Well, here you go:

Jamster Chronicles(JC): What is your favorite word?
Jamster: Jam!

JC: What is your least favorite word?
Jamster: Yes or No (pending the situation when hooking up a jam session).

JC: What turns you on [creatively, spiritually or emotionally]?
Jamster: Being The Jamster what else?!!

JC: What turns you off?
Jamster: Someone that doesn’t want to jam (absolutely no tolerance) .

JC: What is your favorite curse word?
Jamster: Fuckleberry.

JC: What sound or noise do you love?
Jamster: The tapping of my toe nails during a jam (I can hypnotize you with it).

JC: What sound or noise do you hate?
Jamster: I am haunted by the sounds of wannabe Jamsters looking for a buck.

JC: What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Jamster: Other than being The Jamster???? (this question has no purpose in this interview, please remove).

JC: What profession would you not like to do?
Jamster: Snake Feeder

JC: If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
Jamster: Let’s fuckin jam!!!

JC: Thanks so much for granting us this exclusive interview.
Jamster: It was your pleasure. Next time try to come up with some original material. That was the same crap that Bernard Pivot asked me when I appeared on Bouillon de culture. Then Lipton tried to pull the same crap on Inside the Actor's Studio. I went apeshit. They never aired that episode. Pulled a Billy Joel interview out of their ass at the last minute. Lipton still has a restraining order on me. It was total bullshit. I would rather not talk about it anymore. I'm outta here. Get my Driver.

Bees go Buzz and so does this site!

The response has been amazing so far to this fansite - I want to thank all of the supporters personally. If you didn't get to come to the Opening Night Party in San Francisco, don't fret. In our next post, the Jamster Chronicles will publish our exclusive interview, done backstage at the Spring BBQ.

Also, the Jamster will be releasing his new single - currently untitled, later this Spring. Here at Jamster Chronicles we have an exclusive, perhaps bootlegged, copy of some of the lyrics:

Another Jamster Chronicles exclusive -

I received the lyrics to The Jamster’s unreleased new single – HOT

The jamster is small in stature but he’ll put you in a rapture
With his wit, his hits and his skills on the guit
All of the awards and platinum he will capture
He may win an emmy for the late night skit
He secretly wrote for chris parnell and andy
They keep him on a retainer cuz his rhymin’ skills are handy

PDIDDY would be shitty if it weren't for the kiddie
Who poops tracks like a poodle on a walk in the city
Saved Luda when the duda only wrote cow manure
Designs for Gucci when they need haute couture

So bow down erase the frown you sad unfunny clown
And feel the vibrations from the system when they’re pumpin his sounds
Oh yeah forgot to mention transcon went down
because they f*&ked with the Jamster and his one-jam town

copyright 2007

Where the magic happens

The Jamster likes to cozy up by the fire (note: he has his firewood delivered). In these little fireside sessions the Jamster croons sweet nothings for Mrs. Jamster (not pictured here to protect the identities of the innocent).

Look who is on the Mic now...

Okay Ladies and Gents, this pic just in from a secret source - the scoop on this one is hot. The Jamster came out with a dis record calling out all the popular pop vocalists - top of the list? That's right! Justin Timberlake. Come and get it Mr. Timberlake. The Jamster will eat you for breakfast like you were a tasty plate of huevos rancheros con salsa verde.

Welcome to the Jamster Chronicles

We're here to JAM! For who? The Jamster. Funkiest rodent on the planet. Need I say more? Well, I might.

Here is a live shot that a professional photographer snapped of the Jamster this past weekend at an outdoor gig. The place was packed. You should have been there!